The Story I'm About to Share With You is a Story of Personal Transformation. This is a story about how I saved myself.
My name is Robbie Cornelius, by the way. I'm a Spiritual Self Mastery Coach.
This may sound radical to you, but, although I'm a spiritual messenger; I don't have a message for the world.
I tend to speak more from a place of personal experience, rather than ultimate truths.
I think that's what make a spiritual consultant different than a religious consultant. You see that big smile on my face in the picture above?
It took me 27 years to smile like that.
I'm about to be transparent with you: because I believe that it's better to tell your own story, than to have other people attempting to tell it for you.
So here goes nothing!
I started out as a poor child of the ghetto.
A near death experience, at the young age of 7, dramatically shaped my life.
I was struck in the head by a Jeep, while riding in the back seat of my mothers car: and had to have plastic surgery to reconstruct portions of my forehead.
That, along with watching my father abuse my mother for nearly 16 years, conditioned me to be very fearful.
And over a period of time, I became depressed: and then, just flat out angry.
When I was 16, my abusive father died on his birthday.
That triggered me to use the events in my life as an excuse to be a tough guy: but to be honest, I just wanted people to feel sorry for me.
Emotionally, I dropped out of school in the 5th grade: but I didn't physically leave until the 9th grade.
I needed money, so I worked at random jobs from the year 2000 until 2008.
My first job was at Harvey's Supermarket. I started out bagging groceries and got promoted to the produce department.
(Could you imagine this depressed looking face asking you if you needed any help?) Haha!
I left there and went to work at, Sears, in the Shoe department; and got a second job at JCPenny, as a morning janitor.
A few years later, I got a factory job working from 7 pm until 7 am.
After about two years I became an assistant manager at Journey's Shoe Store. Since I worked on commission, I made a decent amount of money. I was naturally good at serving people.
But like the other jobs, the long hours made question my choices.
Deep down inside, I knew that working for someone was not the life for me.
That year, I decided that it was more important for me to spend my time doing what I loved to do; (which was music at the time) than to trade my life for a not so "secure" paycheck; and having somebody tell me when to be at work, when to go to lunch, and when to go home.
I felt like a paid slave.
In 2008, I quit Journey's shoe store to pursue my dreams of becoming a rapper.
Of course everyone thought I was crazy for leaving that "good paying job;" just to follow some stupid dream.
My girlfriend at the time, said that I needed to be responsible, and get a "real damn job."
So with a child on the way, I tried to be a "good man;" so I asked for my job back.
But shortly after, I quit again.
I just knew I didn't come to this earth, just to work, pay bills, and die.
Needless to say, I ended up leaving her to pursue my dreams. With no official place to stay, I ended up sleeping on the couch at a friends house.
As I looked back at everything I'd been through, I felt like a complete loser.
Broke, depressed, and frustrated with life, I decided to channel my poor energy in a constructive way.
I began writing songs that expressed the way I felt on the inside.
Anger, rage, sadness, guilt, and resentment, was 90% of what I wrote about.
But at the time, it was the only way I knew how to vent.
I admit; I struggled going after this dream!
At times I didn't know what I was going to eat. But living my dreams kept me full.
I questioned myself so many times: but no matter how hard it got for me, I was determined to make it!
I recorded my first album and started handing them out to everyone I knew.
About two months later, just when I was about to give up; something amazing happened.
My fan base kept getting bigger and bigger in small cities around the world.
People started offering me hundreds and even thousands of dollars to perform at events.
Every night I sung my heart out about the dark realities of my past. My near death experience at the age of 7; my poor upbringing, family violence, street violence. You name it!
My fans loved hearing me sing about about the struggle; so I continued write and perform those records.
I became an independent rock star with a cult-like following.
Eventually, I ended up being featured in the worlds largest hip-hop magazine.
It was the same magazine I daydreamed about being in as a kid.
I started recording and performing with a few well-known celebrities.
I got invited to exclusive parties and events: events like BET, and MTV Music Awards, etc.
It felt good to prove all of my doubters wrong.
It felt good to prove to the mother of my kids that I could do it.
But the more popular I became, the more smoking, drinking, and partying I was doing every night.
I now realize that I was unconsciously attempting to drown out my sorrows with liquor bottles.
Limousines became my second home.
I was making money, and living flashy on the outside; but I was a very poor on the inside.
On top of that, I realized that I still had unresolved issues.
Even in a room full of people, I felt alone.
I would be at parties, and just sit to myself and think; "Is this it?
Everyone around me seemed so fake.
Deep down inside, I knew that I couldn't really trust anyone; because I didn't trust myself.
I grew tired of singing about the same old struggles and heartaches.
I was tired of glorifying street life, and gang violence.
I grew tired of the drugs, tobacco, and alcohol.
I grew tired of the music game.
I wanted to change my life.
I wanted to be happy.
But I didn't know how.
In 2011, with no explanation to my fans, I decided to leave music for good: head home, and spend some time to myself.
When I got home, I turned my cell phone off, deactivated my Facebook account, turned the television and radio off, and just sat to myself.
Occasionally I would watch Netflix. And that's how I discovered "The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne."
Other than seeing my girlfriend, and my kids, I was isolated from the world.
My family and friends thought I went over the deep end.
Everyone said I was acting strange.
I would spend hours just sitting in nature; staring at the sky, the trees, the birds, the butterflies, the ants.
I would ask questions such as, "do they, (the sky, the trees, the birds, and the bees) believe in a God?
Who am I?
What is the purpose of Life?
Why have I struggled so much?
Why am I not happy?
I was inspired to meditate.
There, I faced my inner-demons: which included the hatred of my father; my fearful religious ideas of God and the devil: and also the unconscious anger I had for the man that crashed his Jeep in my face when I was 7.
And one day during meditation, I spontaneously burst into tears of joy and cried like a baby as I forgave myself, my father, my ideas about gods and devils; and everything I'd been through.
For the first time ever, I experienced inner-peace, and a deep, rich sense of happiness.
For the first time ever, I fell in love with myself, and I fell in love with Life.
That day, I quit smoking and drinking immediately.
After experiencing 365 days of pure happiness, I decided to help others experience the same.
My spiritual awakening caused me to take 100% responsibility for my life experience. As long as I blamed others for my troubles, I was slave. The moment I accepted my power to choose the way I wanted to be, was the moment I was set free.
Today, my life experience continues to get better and better. I have a great relationship with my two boys. And most of all, I have a great relationship with myself.
I don't have a message for the world. I only have a message for you.
I'm here to tell you that everything you've been through up until this point, is only a memory: memories that are often fueled by strong emotions. And since you keep evoking those strong emotions, you keep getting similar experiences.
From my personal experience, when you have the courage to go within yourself, and face yourself, you'll be able to turn led into gold.
You'll be able to turn your sorrow into joy.
And you'll be able to turn your failures into a success.
Instead of wishing for a better life; spend your time becoming a better life.
Life will change for the better, when you change for the better.
In the books below, I have went into great detail as to what I did to change myself for the better.
My question to you is, are you ready to Become the Life You Want to Experience?
Digital Entrepreneur | Self Mastery Coach | Investor | Father | Author